Arboretum Review – A Botanical Bloodbath

As a reviewer, I pride myself on being somewhat professional and making sure I play each board game enough to form an opinion. For me, the minimum amount is three times, with heavier games, this can take five or more. However, with Arboretum I only played it one time.

And I’m never playing it again.

In Arboretum, you’re trying to build this perfect botanical garden filled with Cherry Blossoms, Maples, and Jacarandas. You’ll create rows of plants, trying to create lines between two different cards of the same plant, where every plant in between is numbered in ascending order.

Each turn you’ll draw two cards, add them to your hand, and then place one in your garden. Afterwards, you’ll have to discard a card to your discard pile face up.

Drawing a card doesn’t have to be from the shared draw deck. Instead, you can also draw from any discard pile around the table. It turns out, that the saying ‘one person’s trash is another person’s treasure,’ applies to trees as well. Before long you’ll think twice before putting a card into the discard pile, because it may be the one card your opponent needs.

No there’s one more rule I need to go over, and it’s a big one.

You Have to FIGHT, for Your RIGHT, to Score Points

After the deck, is empty and the game is over, you get to score Aboretum. Here, you call out tree species one at a time. Then, players total the cards in their hand for that species, and only the player with the highest sum scores the points for that species.

For example, you’ve just spent all game putting together a path of Cassias, it’s six cards long. In your hand, you’ve saved seven of Cassias. This should give you a good shot at scoring it come the end of the game.

During scoring, Cassias are called and you lay down your seven. Your opponent – who has no Cassias in their Arboretum – lays down an eight of Cassias. Now, what happens to your wonderful path and all the hard work you put towards it? Well, it’s worthless now – it’s worth zero points.

Nada.

Nil.

Now, this makes Arboretum an unapologetically mean game. You’ll be holding onto cards throughout for the sole purpose of tanking another player’s hard work. However, it’s still an awesome and unique mechanic that ties the game together.

Because, if you remember, you need to discard cards on your turn, and players can pick up your discards. But now you have two compelling reasons to hold onto cards. This makes the decision of what to discard insanely difficult, as there’s so much to factor into it.

Especially towards the middle and later stages of the game, where you’ll already have a great hand for the end of the game. Yet, you’ll then draw that one card that’s better than everything you already have. Figuring out then what you need to discard is agonising, and brilliant. Providing the same depth, and level of tension as Hanamikoji. Which is incredible.

I Owe You an Apology

Like all board games I end up purchasing, I did my research on Arboretum. Critics and fans raved about it saying: a fantastic game, but it’s mean. I didn’t think too much of it, I’ve played mean games in the past but haven’t found anything outrageous. So I thought everyone was being a bit sensationalist, just big babies getting upset at a bit of direct interaction.

I was wrong.

Arboretum is meaner than my high school bully.

When I played with my wife, and saw she had a 1-5 path of Tulip Poplar, and I just drew the 8 of Tulip Poplar. An angel, and devil appeared on my shoulders, and all I could utter was a very worried: Oh, no, no, no.

Arboretum is a game about minimizing your opponent’s score as much as it’s about generating a score for yourself. You can get one point through the positive action of planting a tree, or if you save the right card you can remove five from your opponent.

In this way, it creates a unique puzzle where it dissects your brain into Ying and Yang. As you compare how constructive a move might be for you, versus how destructive a move might be for your opponent.

If you can get past the feeling of being a bad guy, you’ll find a lot to love within Arboretum. When I wasn’t feeling like I was punching the love of my life in the stomach every turn, I enjoyed the distinct decisions the game forced me to make, and the tension that came with it.

And the Oscar for Worst Production Goes to…

I need to give a shout-out to Renegade Games for creating the most garish and ugly deluxe edition I’ve come across. The saving grace of the edition is the bamboo box, which looks fantastic and brings out the nature theme of the game.

But the foil on the cards is awful. You can’t look at them without sunglasses, or you’re going to get a glare in your eyes. So if you’re going to pick up Arboretum, spare yourself the cash and grab the standard edition.

Overall, it’s hard to call this a review, it’s more of a cautionary tale and because I’ve only played it once be sure to take my word with a grain of salt.

Still, I rate Arboretum. It’s filled with tough choices, and I was engaged from start to finish in puzzling out what I needed to keep, and what I could safely get rid of. While also figuring out what I could get away with to avoid sleeping on the couch tonight.

As much as I enjoyed these crunchy decisions, it’s a game I’d rather play at a convention, or online, where I can dehumanize the opponent and allow myself to be mean. Otherwise, I have too much of a conscience to play with friends and family. So ultimately, Arboretum sits alongside Hanabi.

A fantastic game but not for me.