The advertised perfect Christmas isn’t something we get in Australia. No snow, inhabitable climate for reindeer, and Australians generally don’t put effort into any holiday – except for Australia Day, when we drink beer, put snags on the barbie and watch the cricket. With that in mind, I’ll be reviewing Christmas-opoly.
You clicked the more button. Are you kidding me? I was really hoping no one would do that. Alright, well, this a special post – I mean, it’s in the title. I’m going to be talking about what I’m doing for Christmas – if you came for board games or Christmas-opoly. ABORT NOW!
I think I’ve deserved at least one masturbatory post, but before I go on, I need to prep you. First of all, there won’t be a review this week, as I just wouldn’t have the time. Secondly, I need you to imagine a smooth piano transition, and then look up slowly to your left once you’re done with this next sentence. OK. Ready?
It all started on the eve of Christmas Eve. My wife and I took our newborn out to my friend’s Christmas party where the goal was to play board games and watch Die Hard. I brought Monikers because a) I really want to play more Monikers, and b) last time I was over there everyone got drunk and then wanted to play Deception: Murder in Hong Kong. Since it was impromptu, they turned to me for rules. I was not prepared. This time I came with a game that is as simple to teach as it is to play.
It wasn’t needed. Instead we ended up playing the latest Jackbox on Nintendo Switch. It was great fun but went super not-safe-for-work super quickly. We made a T-Shirt which had a cartoon poo and the caption ‘My other shirt is a Millennium Falcon’. We also had someone say that they don’t need any fingers to wipe their ass. Both were pretty great, but the answer I was most proud of was to the question: what is the leading cause of death of Carebears? My answer: Auto-erotic asphyxiation.
After all that fun, we then watched Die Hard. Turns out I’d never seen it all the way through. It was a little sad every time Alan Rickman appeared on screen.
Tonight, being Christmas Eve. We went over to my Mum’s place to drink as much eggnog as we could manage and open presents. I got Pandemic: Iberia – because I bought it, gave it to my wife, and said give this one to me – and also Photosynthesis – though it didn’t arrive in time. Instead, I got some compensatory Twix bar, which is hands down my favourite chocolate. My mother-in-law gave us a bit of money earlier in the month which I bought Shifty Eyed Spies with. So all in all, a pretty good haul.
That was my feeling until my brother got a Playstation VR. Screw that asshole. I kid, it should be good for him, and a way to invite myself over to his place more often. I look forward to trying that out sometime.
Tomorrow, we will be caravaning across Brisbane to go to my Aunt’s place and have an old fashioned Christmas feast. Consisting of ham, turkey, cranberry spread and awkwardly attempting to make small talk with cousins that we only see twice a year. My brother and I are certifiable geeks, he writes game guides for a living, and well, I have this blog. The other side of the family are more sports fans and less into pop culture. One day we’ll find a middle ground, but I don’t think it’ll be tomorrow.
I have the rest of the week off from work; not going back until the 2nd. I’m going to try to write a review for Robinson Crusoe, and then convince my wife to play as many games with me as possible. I’ll also be playing a bunch of the PC game Planet Coaster. I’ve had a mad hankering to play a sim game, and it’s scratching me in all the right places at the moment.
Finally, I just want to give my heartfelt thanks to those who’ve read, commented, liked, or followed my work so far. With a million and one board game blogs out there, choosing to spend your time on this one means a lot to me. I hope you have the very best Christmas. Enjoy your time off, and stay safe.
My call to action this week is to let me know what you got in the comments!